Massage Oils Review and Illustrated Handjob Tips

   
 20/03/2017    massage

They say it's a hard life, but somebody has to do it, and whilst putting a new massage oil through its paces we decided to take the opportunity to write about, and illustrate, some of our favourite handjob techniques. I hope you enjoy what might just be our naughtiest article so far.


Aside from discussing massage oil, in this article I'd really like to dispel any notion that a handjob has to be seen as some sort of inferior cousin of the blowjob.

I'm not talking distant memories of virginal fumblings in the back row of the local cinema, or a hand slipped tentatively down the front of your first boyfriend's shellsuit bottoms. What I have in mind is merciless, toe-curling pleasures, skillfully blended with extended teasing, scientifically lavished upon your bloke so that he thinks all his birthdays have come at once!

This article was prompted by a new massage oil that we bought a couple of months ago - Hemp Seed Massage and Body Oil. We'd previously always stuck with Massage in a Bottle, which is long-lasting and has a lovely fruity scent, but on the basis of some really positive reviews we recently decided to give this hemp based oil a try.

And so, onto the job at hand... if you'll pardon the expression! There are endless possibilities open to you, but here we have illustrated and described six of our favourite techniques.

Everyone is different of course, but I can pretty much guarantee that your hubby will be delighted that you've decided to devote a bit of time to playing with his manhood. For yourself, you can enjoy teasing him and watching his pleasure build, then backing off before building the intensity again. It pays off in other ways too. With regular intense massage, such as we're describing below, you'll find he's lasting longer in bed too. (A sneaky side-benefit, shhh, let's keep that to ourselves!)

And so, onto this roundup of our favourite techniques:

Oil Up His Love Machine

Begin by covering your fingers and palms with your chosen massage oil. My advice is to use as much as you think you'll need, then add about the same amount again, and just to be on the safe side, tilt the bottle and drizzle more oil around your hubby's nether regions!

I typically find that by getting him really oily right at the start, you can probably get away with just one or two re-applications of massage oil, leaving you free to focus on your erotic play. The smell of this hemp massage oil is lovely, quite earthy and fresh, and you'll find you are getting a constant waft of the scent as temperatures rise.

Make your initial moves a gentle warm up massage, smoothing his sensitive inner thighs and hips, making sure his equipment is well oiled, and beginning to get firmly ready for the tantalising handjob action to follow.

Lift and Tease His One Eyed Monster

I'm calling this next technique the lift and tease. Gently cradle his erection in your oily palms and very, very lightly, wrap your fingers around. Without really gripping him at all, slowly ease your hands up and down his length. It should feel more like brushing against his skin, rather than a rubbing motion. Keep this gentle movement going, and gradually bring his penis upright, as you continue your lightly teasing motion.

Also, don't neglect his balls. Begin with careful caressing strokes, or even motionless support from a free hand cupped around them while your other hand explores elsewhere. It's a very sensitive region of course, but don't be too overcautious, because some gentle rubbing will be highly pleasurable.

Everlasting Strokes for his Bacon Torpedo

I've heard this called by various names, but the basic idea is to alternate your hands to create the sensation of a continuous one way motion - and it works in both directions. It's a classic technique, and an essential element of your handjob arsenal.

To simulate the feeling of an everlasting penetration, start with one hand around the tip of his penis and slide down towards his balls. As soon as there is space, bring your other hand around his tip and begin sliding both hands downwards together. When your lower hand reaches the base of his shaft, take the opportunity to gently glide down over his balls before bringing that hand back to his tip and repeating the pattern.

You can do exactly the same in reverse, for an endless pulling sensation. Obviously don't overdo the pulling, you're not trying to literally yank it off! You might choose to introduce some slight twisting motions as your hands slide around his penis, and obviously vary the rhythm. A few seconds of rapid hand-over-hand between slow gliding along his slippery sausage will drive him nuts.

Light a Fire in his Love Muscle

Please don't take this too literally of course! The firestarter reference simply alludes to the action of rolling his penis gently between your palms. Vary the speed and position. If you try this quickly right around the tip of his penis it can be really intense and you might need to ease back and focus a bit of attention lower down his joystick, if you don't want to let him cum too soon.

As well as this palms either side position, vary your moves by placing the tip of his penis into the centre of your palm. Support his shaft with your free hand and gently move your palm around in a slow rocking, rolling motion.

These 'rolling' technique works best for me with fairly flat palms and straight fingers, but you don't have to use your whole hand. If you use your index and middle fingers alone, you can make really focused and delicate movements around his tip. You're certain to enjoy watching his reactions to this. I've had the hubby physically gasping with pleasure at this simple technique!

Fingering Fun for his Flesh Rocket

If things are moving too fast while you're playing, you'll want to be ready to mix in some more subtle teasing. Always remember that the most sensitive area is the head of his penis and the inch or so just below. Go down a couple of inches and you can more easily keep him on a plateau of pleasure with much less chance of tipping him over the point of no return. If you're really looking to extend the teasing, don't be afraid to lay his cock down on his belly and spend a few moments rubbing his inner thighs and the skin all around the pubic area.

As another suggestion, try closing your eyes, and with nothing but the feedback of your delicately wandering fingertips, trace out the shape of every ridge, vein and contour. Take it nice and slow. Through your touch alone, learn the different textures from the loose skin cradling his balls (take it easy here!) to the tight skin up his rock hard shaft, to the almost velvety smooth texture of his tip.

Vary the pressure. Keep it light and teasing around the tip, but apply more pressure for a fingery massage in the middle area of his knob.

Another fun variation is to pretend your fingers are like jellyfish tentacles, twitching and wriggling as you dip up and down over the head of his penis. Use your thumb to apply gently rolling pressure to the aforementioned sweet spot, as I'm reliably informed this feels amazing.

Keep his Big Banana Creaming

And so we come to the inevitable conclusion. I cannot stress this enough - after all your efforts so far, the last thing your man needs is a halfhearted finish. Think of the way he cums during sex, with deep, perhaps almost frantic thrusting. The same sort of thing applies here. Keep the stimulation going right through his orgasm, being a little more gentle with the head of his cock, which is going to be ultra-sensitive at this stage.

It's going to be hot, it could be messy, and maybe even a little sticky, so embrace your naughty side, and go for it!

I'll confess right now that I'm not the greatest fan of the smell of cum. At least with a blowjob you can swallow immediately and it's practically tasteless, apart from the saltiness. But, despite being sensitive to the smell, I can definitely confirm that by using loads of scented massage oil, any slight odours are almost completely masked.

As he starts to soften, switch to using gentle, smoothing strokes and caresses. A little bit of tender after-care will make the whole experience even more memorable. Now is the time to simply bask in the afterglow of your man's pleasure, cuddle up, laugh about the oily messiness, and maybe have a couple of tissues handy at the bedside! ;-)


Summary

In conclusion, I hope these half-dozen tips spark up some ideas for you and your partner. Your hubby will love being the focus of your attention, and in my experience you will be more than amply repaid when he simply can't wait to return the favour.

Our current top picks of massage oils:

Be generous with the oil - the slipperier the better. Just be aware that oil based products do not play well with a lot of sex toy products (and condoms) so our advice is to stick to hands only for this experience.